Mama, a Global Pandemic Doesn’t Change This: You are doing enough.

I say Mama, but I mean Woman. Please read whether or not you are a mother, and make it ’til the end. I have had this conversation toooo many times recently – it’s time to clear this up.

Something dangerous, other than a virus, seems to have spread: a misconception: Since I am at home, I am obligated to accomplish more, do more, and be more productive.

What is this? Who said this? Why is this a thing?

Last week I had two conversations with working mothers who are currently homeschooling multiple children and working from home. They both said that they felt that they are not doing enough for their kids, that they should be more there for their kids at this scary time. Insert googly eye emoji onto my face.

If you are at home, with your family, as many of us are 100% of the time right now, you are there. You couldn’t be there more. You are so. there.

As mothers, and as women, we are always on. And now we are on literally 100% of the time. There are no activities, no childcare, and many of us are still working. (Please also see Glennon Doyle’s IGTV re: “TV Time.”)

When your kids go down for a nap/your work-from-home day is done, you do not always have to fold laundry/paint a room/workout/get more work done/write your first novel.

It is OK to catch up on Love is Blind, do yoga (or workout if that would make you feel good), read a book, and/or take a freakin’ nap! That is OK. And when you hear the voice that says that it’s not OK, I would just invite you to lovingly ask whose voice that is and from where it came.

One of my favourite moments recently: an online friend’s two young boys were dancing on her kitchen counter, eating cookie dough off the beaters, having the time of their lives, and the 4-year-old asked, “Mom, are you still trying to take care of us?” I mean, you just have to laugh and give yourself a break because the current circumstances are whack and we are all doing our best.

Hear this:

If you are at home, not working, but staying healthy, you are doing enough.

If you are working from home, staying healthy, you are doing enough.

If you are homeschooling (and that is a broad term right now) one or more children, you are doing enough.

If you are homeschooling AND working from home AND staying healthy, girl, you are doing more than enough.

If you are lying in your underwear on your couch eating chips, but staying healthy, you. are. enough.

Cut yourself a break, ma, you are enough.

xo